how hard is it to say I will go.
I want to say that with all my might, but I hesitate. Leaving all the comforts of what I know to go into the unknown is not my natural instinct. Rather, the opposite. Actually, I don't know anyone who would willingly go at the drop of a hat to the complete unknown. Be honest with yourself, do you? I know a lot of people (including myself) who will say it upfront in public "Oh yah, I will go wherever God sends me". But truly, honestly, is that what we mean? Is that who we are? Willing and obedient servants of Christ?

What does it mean to "consider all things a loss"? Looking back at my life, I've been blessed more than anything in every way that I've never really encountered or experienced what it truly means to consider all things a loss for the sake of Christ. More or less, I've taken what it means to be a Christian for granted. And many times, often than not, I've failed to comprehend what it means to be a Christ-follower -- to take up my cross and follow regardless of how much it hurts and how many difficulties are on the road ahead. And yet, I falter more and more... My pace slows and my breath grows ragged. I turn back and watch with longing with all that that I am called to leave behind. And slowly but surely, I drag my feet ... not forward, but around, back to where I came from. The pleasures of this world with all its fun and excitement prove too rich and rewarding compared to the incomparable riches of the Glorious One.
The irony of it all is evident.
And yet the realization and the actualization of it all remains.

What does it mean to "consider all things a loss for the sake of Christ" then?
It means going on rewind and fast forward. Once and at once.
My pace quickens and I take a deep breath and right myself again. My feet are squarely planted on the hard and rocky path. Although sores are cutting my feet and my eyes are growing dim, somehow, I know that the sun is rising soon and I will see light again. And so I trudge ... one foot at a time, a groan between each step. Slowly but surely, I leave. I walk. And I run. I run from my life. From what was ... into what is and what will be.
The realization and the actualization of it all is what remains.

But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead. (Phil 3:7-11)