Just to recap on some amusing moments of this past week (well, i found them amusing anyway and I chuckled to myself for a good while).
1. At the library over the weekend in one of those side private booths. Decided that my bladder was about to burst (after chatting for nearly 2 hours to a certain someone in HK). Left computer (i know, dangerous move since so many laptops have been stolen lately from that library) and came back, quite relieved (literally and figuratively since my comp was still there). Proceeded to continue essaying and noticed my hands were incredibly dry. Now, this is where I got really confused. I have these mini hand cream bottles from B&BW and I left it on my library desk.
So, in hopes of moisturizing my hands, I looked around my desk and realized, to my horror, 'IT WAS GONE'!!! And I was shocked because, WHO would take my hand cream bottle and NOT my laptop? I mean, fine, Sweet Pea is a lovely smell, but compared to a great laptop?!?! And so I proceeded to search desperately around my desk and I still couldn't find it! And I checked my bag too and it wasn't there. My suspicions grew and I finally gave in to the fact that... the Stauffer Thief apparently likes Bath & Body Works.
Well... that thought lasted for a good minute until I stood up and looked behind my laptop and realized that my handcream bottle was just sitting there. Fail.
2. Midway through telling my friend how much of a jerkface this guy was to me, I insert the line, "Yah, and I was thinking, "Man, this guy is SUCH a stoopidhead!!!"
Silence on the other end of the phone.
Best friend says dryly: "Wow... I'm sure that comment was such a zinger to his ego!"
Me: "ohh........" *just realizing that 'stoopidhead' really just makes me look... stupid*
[later on in phone conversation] ...
I make some sarcastic remark dissing her.
She replies, "Ok, seriously, stop being such a... such a.. evil monkey!"
And we're English majors too. Fail.
3. As I was trying to open a new garbage bag today, I was thinking in my head, "Wow, wouldn't it be funny if I was trying this hard to open the garbage bag but I was doing it from the wrong end."
[5 minutes later, I kid you not]
I look down and realize that I'd been desperately trying to open the garbage bag from the wrong end.
Fail.
4. As I was attempting to persuade someone to come out to play vball using satirical humor, I accidentally pissed the person off ... and then had to write a huge apology letter to the person. Adding salt to the wound, I read out the letter (what I thought was funny) to my other friend to get her to justify my position and she replies, "No. That's not funny at all. That's actually quite mean".
Fail.
5. I went out clubbing one night with a mutual friend/acquaintance of mine. It was fun and all except as the night progressed, I got more and more uncomfortable with how close she was to me. I don't have a problem with girls dancing with me but the way she was dancing was ... suffice to say, different. Anyway, I brushed off the uncomfortable feeling and danced the night away with her.
I find out later that night that 1) she's a bisexual 2) she had a crush on me
Even later, I tell my best friend about this incident and she laughed nonstop for five minutes. And ended with a succint remark, "PWNED!"
Then she posted on my fb wall the next day in an attempt to remind me of how badly I got pwned (unknowingly) ...
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